Tag: pain

Throwback Thursday: E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial

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How To Buy a Replica Rolex?

The allure of owning a Rolex watch is undeniable. However, the steep price tag often puts it out of reach for many enthusiasts. Fortunately, the market for replica Rolex watches offers a more affordable alternative without compromising on style. In this guide, we’ll explore how to buy a replica Rolex, ensuring you get a timepiece that exudes luxury without breaking the bank.

Understanding Replica Rolex Watches

Before diving into the purchasing process, it’s essential to understand what sets replica Rolex watches apart. While they may mimic the design and aesthetics of authentic Rolex timepieces, replicas are crafted using different materials and manufacturing processes. While some replicas strive for accuracy, others may fall short in terms of quality and durability. If you’re seeking to restore your watch to its former glory and impeccable condition, look no further than this trusted watch service.

Researching Replica Rolex Watches

When shopping for a replica Rolex, thorough research is crucial. Start by seeking out reputable sellers with a track record of delivering high-quality products. Online forums and communities dedicated to watch enthusiasts can provide valuable insights and recommendations. Additionally, reading reviews and testimonials from previous customers can help gauge the reliability of a seller.

Setting a Budget

Replica Rolex watches come in a wide range of price points, making it essential to establish a budget before beginning your search. While some replicas may be priced affordably, others may command a premium for superior craftsmanship and attention to detail. Consider how much you’re willing to spend and prioritize features that are most important to you.

Identifying Your Preferred Model

With countless Rolex models to choose from, selecting the right one can be overwhelming. Take the time to explore different styles and designs to find one that suits your taste and lifestyle. Whether you prefer the classic elegance of the Submariner or the sporty sophistication of the Daytona, there’s a replica Rolex out there to match your preferences.

Checking for Authenticity

While replica Rolex watches may look convincing at first glance, it’s essential to scrutinize every detail to ensure authenticity. Look for telltale signs of a counterfeit, such as misspelled logos, poorly executed engravings, and inconsistencies in serial numbers. Additionally, verify the movement and functionality of the watch to confirm its legitimacy.

Making the Purchase

Once you’ve found the perfect replica Rolex, it’s time to make the purchase. Opt for secure payment methods to safeguard your financial information and ensure a smooth transaction. Be wary of sellers who insist on unconventional payment methods or offer prices that seem too good to be true.

Aftercare and Maintenance

Proper care and maintenance are essential to prolonging the life of your replica Rolex watch. Follow manufacturer guidelines for cleaning and storage to keep your timepiece looking its best. In the event of any issues or malfunctions, seek out reputable watchmakers who specialize in replica Rolex repairs and servicing.

And with that, there’s been talk of how bad E.T. really was. Polygon made a small list with games they thought might be worse so I took the Atari 2600 games on that list for a spin to see which one is the most sucky.

The Contenders:

Tron Screen
Can you beat my score?

Adventures of Tron – It’s similar to a Donkey Kong game where you have to climb ladders to get to where you need to go. What you need to do is collect all the weird flying objects while avoiding other objects. How do you tell the good from the bad? Trial and error. The crap part of this game is that it’s a single screen that only changes color when you switch levels… Or at least as far as I got because the hit box on the collectables is garbage but it’s gigantic on the enemies — A perfect recipe for frustration. But the game made sense, and there was a score that could be used to compare to friends. Definitely not the worse of the bunch.

Star Wars Screen
The walkers would change colors as they were hit

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back – Fly and shoot a never-ending raid of AT-AT walkers. It’s ice planet boring and a pain in the ass to control, but it kind of makes sense in a fucked up George Lucas kind of way.

King Kong Screen
That is supposed to be King Kong!?

King Kong – Take Donkey Kong and have it drawn by a 4-year-old using their off-hand. Then have that monstrosity throw what can only be described as cupcakes (with a candle) at you. When you reach the distressed maiden at the top of the building, repeat the horror again. I opted to run directly into the cupcakes when I realized that my life was Groundhog Daying… Because who wouldn’t want to run directly into a giant cupcake?

Fantastic Voyage Screen
Just flying up this narrow rainbow path, don’t mind me.

Fantastic Voyage – Fly your spaceship up some kind of rainbow road avoiding/shooting things in the way. I guess this is the titular voyage? I would never take this trip… it’s a tiny road filled with crap that is too small to shoot and to fast to avoid. The good part about this game is that the goal is pretty straight forward: fly up and shoot things. The most awful thing about this game is the noise that came out of my headphones. ????? ?????? ?????? As you took damage/continued down the road it was like a heart monitor getting faster, and death was a loud and long flat-line tone. My ears tell me that this should be a contender for the worst of the bunch.

Raiders of the Lost Ark
Look at the snake, if it comes in the middle of the screen it is invisible because it’s the same color as the background.

Raiders of the Lost Ark – I don’t think I had the right controller for this game, but I was able to play a bit. You pick up your gear (like a gun and a whip) while avoiding a snake that blended into the background. Then I would fall down a pit and lose a life. Once there, bird enemies and some evil dude that would try to kill me. Sometimes I could shoot him, other times he took my stuff. It was possible to climb out of the pit, but you’d have to lose a life falling in again if you left.

Alien Screen
Baddies could also be Mousers from Ninja Turtles.

Alien – Take PacMan and make it not possible to kill the ghosts, and then take Frogger and make it impossible to move left and right. When you put that together, you get Alien. All the enemies were different colored T-Rex looking things. The whole time I was wishing the Predator would show up and end everything — the aliens, the game, me, this game journey I put myself in. Ugh.

E.T. Title Screen
My high (and only) score because I wasn’t willing to play again.

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial – The reigning champion of bad. You, as E.T., can run around avoiding the government officials that moved much faster. ????? ????? ?? ??????? You could make E.T.’s head lift up that would teleport him somewhere random. There were little dots around that it seemed like I was collecting and the government officials were taking away from me. Oh, and there were pits of doom all over the place that once you fell in, you’d have to extend E.T.’s head and float out of the pit. And to top all that off, there was a death timer that ticked down as you moved. Did I mention all the pits? More pits than a cherry tree. This game is still the worst of the bunch. ???? ?????? ??? Because Pits.

I tried to put the games in order from bad to worst, let me know if you think that there’s something worse than E.T. on the 2600, because I am willing to put myself through that pain.

Send Me Questions Too!


Since I’m a no-good, unimaginative hack, I am going to take the same questions Serpico answered, and answer them myself. This isn’t the first time I’ve done something like this. But before I get into the letters, I have to get something off of my chest.

The New York Football Giants are a terrible football team. Ever since Serpico was a wee lad, the giants have been terrible. Remember in 1995 when the Patriots were terrible. They were a 6-10 team, but the Giants were worse — 5-11. Or how about 1997 when both the Patriots and the Giants won their respective divisions. ????? ???? ?????? The Giants were worse due to losing in the wild card round.

All I’m saying is that Serpico doesn’t like terrible teams — He actually stopped caring about baseball when the Yankees didn’t have the best record in baseball this year. How can I prove it? He had to email me on the deadline to fix his fantasy baseball lineup for a playoffs week. So I have an answer for Serpico: Follow the Patriots. You are a fair weather fan and we all know it. ???? ??? ???? Just find the biggest band wagon, grab your instrument, and hop on.

Now for the actual questions. Read More

[Business Day One] Season Tickets, A Series of Short Plays


“So, Bill, I was thinking about getting some [favorite NFL Team] Season Tickets.”

“Oh yeah, Rob, that sounds amazing. What a great idea. Eight games worth of excitement in [favorite NFL Team’s home stadium], getting first crack at playoff seats, great parking. Yeah, awesome. Just, you know, let me know in thirty years when you actually get them. Christ, why the flying hell would you want to put yourself on a seventy thousand person waiting list just so that your unborn son can inherit your place in line when you die? I sure hope you like getting a letter every year from [the owner of favorite NFL Team] saying that you moved up five spots and are only a few decades away. If you need me, I’ll be watching the games in my warm living room. ???? ??????? ??? ???? What an idiot.”

*thirty years later*

“They finally came, Bill. They’re finally here. I will be going to the [favorite NFL Team’s new home stadium, built in 2025 and sponsored by a multi-planetary corporation] for every home game from now on!”

“I can’t believe it, Rob. The wait just flew by. Hey, want any company.”

“Go to hell, Bill. Enjoy the games from your living room.” Read More

The Horror. The Horror.

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I can’t help but feel like Col. Kurtz, having journeyed these final 17 games into the dreadful jungle, the gnarled heart of darkness, only to find the inescapable truth that there is no prize, no joy, indeed nothing but horror in the end. Here, horror that a team filled with promise should implode so thoroughly; horror that a cadre of players in a superstitious sport would…not…shut…up; horror that the season is truly, completely, and chillingly over on October 1.

I don’t think I have anything particularly clever or meaningful to add to the conversation surrounding the 2007 Mets’ unseemly demise, but neither did the local tabloids. Nobody could, really, because this kind of collective numbed silence invites only further silence. Pictures of dejected fans, splashy oh-cruel-world headlines, and calls for the head of Willie Randolph are just so much noise in the ether. 888 sport The silence is blistering.

The horror is all that remains.

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