Author: Sean

Sean (Contributor) is a Cambridge, MA resident by way of Warwick, RI. Lacking a professional team in the Ocean State he studied future Red Sox stars in AAA Pawtucket. He's more than willing to sell you his Brian Rose rookie cards. His tastes run the gamut from archery to Arena League. He knows how lucky he is to be a Boston fan at this time, and keeps a clip of the '92 NLCS on his desktop to remind him how a man named Francisco Cabrera could one day totally destroy your city's future. He has appeared on televised talent shows for his remarkable ability to name over 25 NBA teams.

One Giant Leap? Pats Won’t Be Kind

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Strahan

We’re not here for the Giants.

I repeat that the Bud commercials, the FOX globalcast, Tom Petty, the pomp and circumstance: none of them are here for the Giants. For all of their efforts this season, they earn the right to play a sixty minute football game. The Super Bowl is never really about football anyway, and even if it were, the pretty boys to the north would earn the acclaim. The accolades will reduce this year’s NFC Champion to the Washington Generals
Wash Gen in cleats. Read More

Flawless Victories

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Flawless Victory

As of Wednesday they remain at seventeen wins and zero losses. Their woefully overmatched opponents cower in fear, thankful they won’t run into such awesome force again. The offense is nearly unstoppable, running up the score with speed and long-range outbursts. The talent disparity is ungodly, separating them from…the rest. They are on an inexorable march to the southwest, where they will be heavy favorites to take their crown. Some players still show flashes of youthful exuberance, but they are well cautioned to avoid revealing it to their stoic coach, a surefire Hall of Famer now fully moved out of his mentor’s grand shadow. On Sunday, February 3, they will likely be striding confidently as undefeated, but today they still face the enormous pressure of history. ??????? The mythical unbeaten heroes of over thirty years ago refuse to go quietly; each passing year grows their legend. But there is little doubt in my mind that this team will quiet any doubters and run the table to 19 and 0.

Of course, North Carolina will still be 21 wins away from a perfect season. Read More

King of the Mountain

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Norgay and Hilary

We know the numbers well. They exist in yellowed hardbound books, on the backs of bubblegum cards, in the corners of the mind reserved for more important things. Hank Aaron hit 756 home runs, and Barry Bonds may still be going. Michael Jordan won ten NBA scoring titles and six championships. Jim Brown rumbled for over 12,000 yards in nine seasons and retired only because he didn’t feel like running for 12,000 more. Wilt Chamberlain scored 100 points in a single game and it wasn’t even his most remarkable accomplishment of that season. (Of 3,890 minutes the Philadelphia Warriors played that season, Chamberlain was on the court for all but 8 of them.) These are the sporting feats that were collectively ours as fans, athletic magic tricks that made kids marvel and force us to rub our eyes in amazement years later at the ink in the record books. DiMaggio, fifty-six consecutive, Williams at .406. These numbers are spellbinding twofold; one, because they stand towering above their peers’ best attempts, and two because they surge even higher compared to us, the people sitting and watching. My goodness, could any of us even get one hit in a baseball game? It’s almost unthinkable!

Well, here is unthinkable: in 1953, a 33 year old New Zealand beekeeper named Ed Hilary climbed Mount Everest, a 29,029 foot knife carved in ice. Read More

Refusing To Settle

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Bobby In JanuaryBobby In SeptemberBobby In December

Suite 1604A
Radisson Fayetteville
Fayetteville, AR
December 31, 2007

Dear all,
Merry Christmas! I’m crimson with shame that I haven’t gotten the holiday letter out sooner. The packing and unpacking has taken quite the toll on me and the rest of the family. (As we speak, Robert, silly goose, is scrawling spread formations on the suite walls!) Kelsey and Nick finished their exams in Georgia with solid Bs, and we’re still speaking with the principal and the fire department about Katie’s spring reinstatement. Bobby Jr.’s lessons are going swimmingly; his stuttering is r-r-really disappearing! I caught his neighborhood friends lifting him by the shorts. It must be a going away ceremony. Read More

Fly Straight And True

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It’s Christmastime in my neck of the woods, and that means it’s the season for giftgiving and merrymaking. Since I am in a giving mood, I’ve decided to curl up by the hot-stove fire and share with you my one Christmas wish for the 2007 season. ???? ??????? Without further ado:

Hotlanta Hawks

It’s for the Atlanta Hawks, and it’s a good basketball team. Poor Atlanta. Their baseball team is no longer the juggernaut it once was in the days of My So Called Life and Democratic Party competence. ???? ??? ???? Their football team apparently folded at the completion of last season. ????? ???? ???? ????? Their hockey team isn’t important enough for me to even look up to make a joke (I know they are the Thrashers and that one should not joke about cars in regards to them). And the Atlanta Hawks, oh dearie me, the Hawks are 14-12, bolstered by their decent 9-6 home record. Oh, but it is often a cruel and disappointingly temperate winter in Peachland, and the Hawks have never so much as reached a conference final in their history. In 1969, they lost to the Lakers in the Western Division Final, but “Western Division Final” should give you a good idea as to how friggin’ long ago that was. It may be said that the Hawks have never had a season for fans to discuss with great pride; the ’94 campaign boasted 57 wins and an embarrassing second round flameout against the young Indiana Pacers.

To me Atlanta has boasted an inordinate amount of likable players over the years; I think of Doc Rivers, Dominique Wilkins, Mookie Blaylock, Stacy Augmon, 58 year old Kevin Willis, and the vexing stopovers of Shareef Abdul-Rahim, JR Rider, and Antoine Walker. Even their coach, the reserved and decent Lenny Wilkens, was a Providence College alum, instantly making him my beloved family. (He’s the winningest and losingest coach in NBA history, if you remember. You probably don’t.) To see this franchise year-in and year-out take up 25 seconds of highlight time 43 minutes into Sportscenter saddens me, if only because they deserve something for not moving by now. Flash forward to this year, with Joe Johnson, the Joshes (Smith and Childress), and Marvin Williams running the show, with rookie duo Al Horford and Acie Law IV providing a glimpse of the future. Under the totally anonymous leadership of Mike Woodson, the Hawks could very feasibly make the playoffs this season, ending a NBA-leading eight year drought. Who wouldn’t root for the Hawks?

Have a Merry Christmas, or don’t. Either way, take Tuesday off.

At Last, Our Long National Nightmare Is In Print Form

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The Mitchell Report(Unlike most NoS articles, I feel the need to write this here: this article is about the Mitchell Report and is my personal opinion and not necessarily the other guys’ here on what’s going on. Other columnists may have their opinions and you may see them here, too.)

The Mitchell Report will not end steroid use any more than a nuclear bomb will end warfare. Read More

Two Crazy People In A Moderately Sane World

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Mercury RisingHank
One guy played the game. The other guy didn’t. One guy still works in the business; the other one doesn’t. They both still have the itch, the passion, the unceasing desire to stand in the spotlight and earn their laurel as winner. And so both of these men bravely spout declarations and pronouncements without the plague of having to stop and listen to their words. It’s understandable when you’re out of the limelight for a long time, and then one day you get a phone call from a reporter, which becomes two, than three, than throngs. A fair mix of blowhards and enablers called national sports media remains all too eager to hold out the tape recorder and focus the camera. Mercury Morris, Hank Steinbrenner, welcome to the Quotable Club! Read More

Success Isn’t Blessed In The BCS Mess

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Crystal Footballtrain wreck

First SoCal and Geaux Tigers had their toes in the door
Then Stanford shocked SoCal, the doormats no more!
So Just Cal moved to 2nd in all football land
(Thanks a ton, Cardinal, and again for the band!)

But Just Cal stumbled when Kevin Riley slipped
On a junior high brainfart when his legs took a trip
Now Just Cal is gone and what the hell? LSU?
Kentucky in three OTs leaves them feeling blue Read More